Useless freak!

Holiday's here at last, went back Tasting Notes on Saturday, 14 June. 2nd year anniversary, but with much disappointment at the crowd and atmosphere. Though with a theme this year, the outcome wasnt as expected. Even for me, I wasnt aware of the theme till I arrived to see the staffs in beach wear and waterbombs. Guess what's the theme yet? -.-""

Although I wasnt splashed, Norbert didnt let me passed. Hugged me from the front and back with his entirely soaked clothings. Everyone I knew was busy working, the rest couldnt come or maybe they have forgotten its the anniversary I don't know. Left not long after chatting with Mr Ma, Jimmy, Angela and Eunice. Told Angela I be back to help out Tastings, didnt tell her for how long though. Shall see how things goes.

God Bless.

There is still one issue hovering over my thoughts, which I cannot get over with. It is getting rather devasting and affecting me from bad to worse eventually leading to the thought of leaving but I cannot bear to. Everytime I look on the bright side that everything will be fine eventually, maybe its not as bad as I feel it to be but the paranoid side of me will step in. I cant help but being over-sensitive over the issue. Probably because it happened too unexpectedly for me to digest what's happening.

Was it my actions? My words? My behaviour?

How I wish for happier moments to resurface.

All was well and happy till then. Neither would I want such an ending for such a night for us. But things weren't just as planned I guess.

For a moment I was angry, angry at you for having me to always be guessing what's on your mind, what is it that made you unhappy. How I wish for you to just voice out even if it is not pleasing to the ear. I might not react at the point of time but at least I know what's the problem is. At least I get to understand you better and reconsider my actions.

Given your temper, I knew it quite well enough that you won't have taken in any of the words by them, instead you bore your temper out. Both Brian and you were at fault, having to lose both your flare almost breaking out into a fight. I know what Brian is concern about, but to you I can only guess many different possibilities that you are unhappy. I was at wrong too to show my attitude at you, but I was just upset not knowing what's on your mind and with your usual reponse of "nothing". It bothers me.

One more week before the first paper.

My mind still feels blank.

Oh no...