Complications of a Girl

Changes

2008-08-22T23:08:00.002+08:00

Nothing ever remains the same. Changes occur all the time. Having a rather stagnant personality, I hate changes. Unable to accept them wholeheartedly in the most willing method. But still, sometimes no matter how hard you try to be oblivious to the surroundings, you cant escape the fact.

No point in denying the facts that is right in front of you, no point in continuing to perceive on either. Be it matters of the heart, my daily life, work, nothing is in place. All in a mess now.

How I wish to wake up from this bad dream.

2nd anniversary, Tasting Notes

2008-06-16T21:51:00.003+08:00

At last, done with the final paper. Awaiting for the results to be posted out. Not too high a hope though. Just no red mark and I be more than glad.

What an expectation I have for myself.

Useless freak!

Holiday's here at last, went back Tasting Notes on Saturday, 14 June. 2nd year anniversary, but with much disappointment at the crowd and atmosphere. Though with a theme this year, the outcome wasnt as expected. Even for me, I wasnt aware of the theme till I arrived to see the staffs in beach wear and waterbombs. Guess what's the theme yet? -.-""

Although I wasnt splashed, Norbert didnt let me passed. Hugged me from the front and back with his entirely soaked clothings. Everyone I knew was busy working, the rest couldnt come or maybe they have forgotten its the anniversary I don't know. Left not long after chatting with Mr Ma, Jimmy, Angela and Eunice. Told Angela I be back to help out Tastings, didnt tell her for how long though. Shall see how things goes.

God Bless.

Problems

2008-06-02T11:16:00.003+08:00

Sunshine after the rain.

As true as the words can get.

There is still one issue hovering over my thoughts, which I cannot get over with. It is getting rather devasting and affecting me from bad to worse eventually leading to the thought of leaving but I cannot bear to. Everytime I look on the bright side that everything will be fine eventually, maybe its not as bad as I feel it to be but the paranoid side of me will step in. I cant help but being over-sensitive over the issue. Probably because it happened too unexpectedly for me to digest what's happening.

Was it my actions? My words? My behaviour?

How I wish for happier moments to resurface.

Anger

2008-06-01T21:53:00.002+08:00

All was well and happy till then. Neither would I want such an ending for such a night for us. But things weren't just as planned I guess.

For a moment I was angry, angry at you for having me to always be guessing what's on your mind, what is it that made you unhappy. How I wish for you to just voice out even if it is not pleasing to the ear. I might not react at the point of time but at least I know what's the problem is. At least I get to understand you better and reconsider my actions.

Given your temper, I knew it quite well enough that you won't have taken in any of the words by them, instead you bore your temper out. Both Brian and you were at fault, having to lose both your flare almost breaking out into a fight. I know what Brian is concern about, but to you I can only guess many different possibilities that you are unhappy. I was at wrong too to show my attitude at you, but I was just upset not knowing what's on your mind and with your usual reponse of "nothing". It bothers me.

Happy Birthday

2008-05-30T00:00:00.004+08:00

27 May~
Happy Birthday Byrick.

Wonder what would it have been like if you were still around.

2 years have passed since that faithful night.

Somehow memories just keep flowing into me every now and then, how we (Biyu & I) asking you a silly question of dying our hair during interview, how we nuture under your guidance, the late night movies and supper, staying back after work to wash out the whole restaurant, the time when we (Biyu & I) first got drunk turning the washroom into stink pits, sleeping over in the store room once.

All so precious, deeply engraved in our hearts.

Happy Birthday~

Blank out

2008-04-30T11:45:00.001+08:00

One more week before the first paper.

My mind still feels blank.

Oh no...

I'm a Happy Person

2008-04-14T11:00:00.001+08:00

Feeling Happy...

Looking forward to my weekends

Exam Periods

2008-04-07T17:05:00.002+08:00

One month to my first paper.

Havnt finished studying yet.

No time for play.

But my mind is just not concentrating.

Help!

New Beginning

2008-04-03T23:55:00.002+08:00

Things always happen for a reason.

But for some cases, reasons are not always valid.

Actions are dependable on thoughts.

But sometimes people act without much considerations.

I for once have given much consideration before coming to such a conclusion. Though I am still feeling a little unsure of myself at times, I hope things will work out well.

Stepping out on this new path is not going to be easy.

Exhausted

2008-03-26T00:51:00.002+08:00

Everything's all cramped up again.

Nothing's ever right and peaceful for me.

Happiness is not forever.

Really unsure what have I done wrong.

Racked my brains for days, weeks.

Still no outcome.

Exhausted.

Problems come one after another.

Feeling all cramped up.

What's with me?

What do I actually want?

Am I really that difficult?

Too stubborn?

So many questions running through my mind.

But no answers to all of it.

Wish I could just disappear to thin air...

Reflections

2008-03-06T18:01:00.003+08:00

Is it just mine luck or that it things always just happen so concidental for me in life? Tried so hard to squeeze everything out of my head and then "poof" have to be reminded of it everytime that I succeed getting the thoughts wash off. IRRITATED!

Not blaming anyone, maybe it's just me being too over sensitive, too over everthing.

Suffering from "diminishing" brain-juice ~crap~

Can't wait for the prelims to be over, in need for some real fun before settling back to my books again for the real showdown.

Ha! Surprised at myself, confining at home, facing the same four walls everyday, flipping my books day in day out.

Did quite alot of reflections, who do I really have by my side?

Soul mates, play mates, work mates, school mates.

They seem to just come and go.

Stressed out

2008-02-28T23:03:00.004+08:00

Things seems to be getting rather stagnant here a little. And probably over for a period. Yea, time of the period again, the big show down... Exams~ Shall post up some photos =) Missing my dear friend, now in aussie. Cant wait till next year when I go bulk with you! Free loading!!! LOL

S4~

Dont go Fishy~

Stares up..lol

Fishy & Clara

Fishy & Dou

Fishy & me

With Grace~

Group Photos~

1st Feb Bball Gathering

2008-02-04T12:45:00.000+08:00

2nd February Bball gathering cum Biyu's farewell~

I am 21!!!

2008-02-04T12:16:00.000+08:00

Just hitting the big "2", now I am a legal adult~ Hahaha...

Fittings

2007-12-17T23:20:00.000+08:00

Brought my darling babies to their fittings today for the Semi-casual and Formal wear.

Started off at , their clothings there are all so "WOW" to the maximum, would never imagine myself stepping into the shop to purchase.

*Laughs

Everything started out fine, but as more and more clothings were being tried as they cant find a suitable one, the salepersons mood changed as well. Didnt dare approached her much after that anyway, went over to Four Skin to check on the guys section. Had much fun mixing and matching clothes, choosing outfits for them to try out.

Got a peak view at the girls gowns over at Wisma's Daniel Yam thereafter lunching before we when over to G2000 after lunch for the guys formal wear fittings. Had alot of fun choosing the clothes for the guys there. But had a damn hard time selecting suitable ties to match the outfits, as the choices was so limited. At least everything ended well and that's that!

Another round of training for the contestants tomorrow, the final training at Shine Models. Then come their previews in school before the Day itself.

Bless everything be well

*Cheers

Rush Hour

2007-12-16T23:23:00.000+08:00

Had been quite some time. Havnt got time to do so many stuffs I want to do, been preoccupied and all by the upcoming pageant. Four more days to go before the actual day, four m0re days of rushing, trainings, last minute touch ups to deal with. God bless everything will go smoothly for this event.

Christmas is around the corner, havnt got about with the gifts, wonder if I would have the time. So many things yet so little time...

Awww!

Tribute to Jeremy

2007-11-28T23:07:00.000+08:00

Was in disbelief when I heard of it through a friend. Struck by the same feeling of hurt and lost like the year before when I received the news. I thought it was some prank call, a lie, a joke. Then I saw the news on television and newspaper reports with your photos on it.

My heart aches deeply for you my friend, whom I was not given the chance to known you for a longer period. Your tiny eyes ever sparkling with joy, contagious smile that lifted spirits, ever passion for your love in life. A motivator for all. It's all to sudden, so unexpected, so unfair to take away someone like you from everyone forever.

But like everyone said, you left doing what you love, now in a place where there will be no pain, no saddness only happiness.

In memorance to you, Jeremy...

Tears of sorrow, pain and lost flows down my cheek. I pray for you my friend, finding your peace, continuing your passion in the land so faraway. Ever watching over your family & friends. Miss you dearly dear friend. So long and good bye till the day we shall set our foot on the same path again.

Ting Feng 21st Birthday

2007-11-19T13:57:00.000+08:00

Though having a Sunday lesson in school was already quite unbelivable yet true, at least there was some progammes thereafter to look forward to. Met some of my friends from SRC at Marina South for a small birthday celebration. Didnt really had much, since I never really fancied steamboat anyway cause I dont eat that much! LOL. Anyway photo time!

Presenting the Birthday Boy! (Happy 21st)

Group Photo

Giving of the "cabbage"-like present

Boys be Boys...

"Sexy Backers" with Ting Feng

Team Styler~

Tuang & I

Ying Feng (partner)

Mr Ho Yang~

Club Chic~

Dinner at Blue Ginger

2007-11-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

Went over Blue Ginger with Kenneth & Hwa Ee for dinner. Took some photos. So let the photos tell the story:

*The legendary

Looks who shaving

The moronic penguin & I

Nice background~

*The formal

*Informal outlook!

Down the stairs

*Smiles

City Venture 2007

2007-11-14T21:50:00.000+08:00

City Venture 2007 Begins...

Presenting the team: Sexy Back

Having done with our Don's Pie

Successfully Passing Jumbo Mastermind Game

Conquering Through the box of WORMS!

Enjoying...

Sexiest Backs anyone can view! LOL

Sense of Satisfaction *cheers*

Jump to Victory!

Off the Ground we went...

Completion of the 2 days race :)

*Smiles*

Daily rumbles

2007-11-02T00:48:00.000+08:00

Facing difficulties coping with my school work now. Getting tougher as I can't catch up, slow to understand. Getting zero into my brain. So frustrated! The subjects though some similar to poly but their methods and answerings all somehow totally different. Feel that sometimes I seems to understand but then it feels so unfamilar. Once again, I am behind time and slacking! Cant let this continue!

As for the my pageant project, contestants have been finalised but then somehow everything stopped. No meeting has been held since, rehersals have yet to start and all. Wonder if it will all turn out to be a disaster in the end. Getting rather involved with my project committee though. Joining them in most activities, hanging out together more often & having more contacts. At least I have something to rejoice about here. HA!

Went Mambo night with some of them on last wednesday had great fun. Then joined in Paintball at Orchid Country Club on Sunday. New experience and great bonding making more new friends. Enjoy this feel. More advantures to come in the way...

Tired!!!

2007-10-17T20:26:00.000+08:00

It's been school school school, work and pageant gatherings.

Just a word to decribe it all: HECTIC!

Need to find time to really sit down and study through my lecture notes, havnt really got the time to seriously get to know my subjects and let them be friends with me!

Getting involved in the pegeant, getting to know my friends in the committee better, more commitment and priority given to this project I have choose to take up. All I hope for is a success. Yup!

Just got my long awaited tan at sentosa. Just love the sun, swimming in the salty water of sentosa, feeling the sand under my feet as I run about playing :)

Cant wait for the next trip! Who's going to plan one??!!! LOL!

No Enough Time!

2007-10-03T21:56:00.000+08:00

Getting busier and lacking of time. School life is getting into me. Have to set aside my time to revise my work! So many things are happening concurrently, involvement in the SRC for the pageant happening in late Decemeber with audition starting soon, my work commitment at Seasons Reasons, miscellaneous on going activities requiring planning and organising, plus school time and assignments coming up soon. Not to forget including my training regime to my daily routine again to shape up for the standard charted run. 21km! Still wondering how am I going to make it to the finished line.

Ha! I need more than 24 hours...

Coming to think, I wonder how I made it through the interview that day at the UOL Student Rep. Council, giving unprofessional answers to their questions, seemingly enthusiatic energy yet unserious personality. Currently posted to the Pageant Committee being the Contestant I/C ie. the nanny of the contestants.

Thought things would be boring there, but turns out to be quite adventurous. Coincide with the bash, meaning I would be able to attend it! To be in the Bash committee was actually my 1st choice in the projects department, but I am happy being in the pageant committee :) Made new friends at last in this so-distant school I am in. Taking this chance as a stance to see if I would be able to be up for the job in the events line.

One year

2007-09-25T02:40:00.000+08:00

All seems not so long ago. That we met, we worked under your patience guidance, giving you our fullest support, having one of the many eventful late night activities, sharing with you our worries and joys.

One year have passed since you left us. Feels so unreal still at times thats you are no longer with us. ~Just like when the news was out, no one had believed it was true. Nothing have changed except for your absence, everything still goes on after a while. But deep down in everyone's heart, you are always there. You never once left us and never will.

Byrick, I miss you.

We all do.

Shape Run 2007

2007-09-09T13:49:00.000+08:00

Having only an odd 3 hours of sleep and had to make my way out of the house to marina at 6.30 am. Yup, It's the Shape Run 2007 today. Though only a mere 5km run, it was rather enjoyable. Was feeling quite lathergic due to the lack of sleep, but after looking at the crowd, we were feeling much refreshed. Made it halfway through the run with Hui Wen but she urged me to run ahead and not wait for her. So, I still managed to complete my run in 43 min. But strained my knee area again. Quite painful now, hopefully it wears off soon. Yup :)

Wonder should I sign up for the standard charted race?? Any companions???

After the race at esplanade...

Victory again! Cheers!

New Laptop

2007-09-07T03:55:00.000+08:00

Smiles. Got my own personal laptop at last!

Been having quite a busy schedule these few weeks. Done with the Comex fair, upcoming the NATAS fair and also my other stuffs. Getting the feel of not having enough time get all my stuffs done. I need more than 24 hours! Well hopefully it would be better after all the natas fair. Back to normal life schedules and shall have more time set a side for studies :)

Time to move on

2007-08-23T12:01:00.000+08:00

Life is just ever full of surprises, what lies ahead is always unknown. Surprises that could have been pleasant, surprises that are unexpected. Or probably uninvited surprises. But we still carry on moving on, discovering more surprises down this path.

Confidence is what I lack to propel me in this journey. Afraid to be hurt, afraid to look forward, living in shadows. Having to always look back at my happy past, trying hard to recreate them which is a obivious minimal possibility things would happen again unless I have a time machine.

Time to reschedule all my priorities, set my life back straight and find back myself.

Talk with confidence, walk with confidence, live with confidence.. is that the way?

Kenneth

2007-08-18T14:14:00.001+08:00

Kenneth Stupid Dumb Dumb...

Lousy teacher.

Dumbo

Life

2007-08-15T01:23:00.000+08:00

Life is just so ever unfair. Never to achieve everything perfect. What you hope is not what you get. Some things, no matter how hard you try, how persistent you are, you never get it. That's what with the thing call love is like. You get all hooked up, all soft and hurt over it. But you never really stop feeling for them till one day when somethings really happen that makes your heart stop skipping. Some people get over it like a change of clothes, some take ages, some just doesn't.

Which category do I belong to?

But there was always the saying that love is not about being with the other party but to see them happy even from afar. I agree though it sometime hurts. But oh well...

Why is it that one never gets what they hope to get but what they least expect, comes unexpectedly to them?

Useless or Foolish?

2007-08-13T17:22:00.000+08:00

Thoughts revolving round my mind, remincsing the happy moments till the night I heard the truth.

30 June.

I was high but it gave me the courage to say out my feelings. Rejected.

07 & 08 July.

Over at BG. Things were kind of awkward, slience. Gone by end of the night, broke down.

13 July.

Watched Harry Potter alone, went drinking alone, ended up gone while all were in restaurant.

21 July.

Came to my limit, admitted SGH. Discharged.

28 July.

Good talk with Dan. Was happy.

29 July~10 August.

Happy & relax. No worries, no troubles.

11 August.

I broke down again. I felt cheated. Cheated by words, by feelings. Vented my anger, hatred rose but vanguished.

Disappointed that words was nothing but a lie to hide me in the dark. Thinking that would be the best way yet is not as the truth would always surface. I was alright. To me, seeing the other happy was enough. Felt like a fool believing all words, blinded by words of beliefs while everyone else sees it coming. News was painful caused it involves the person whom I looked up to at my lowest moments and takes in all she said. Yet this fool now holds no hatred, caused she never can bring herself to hurt or hate anyone.

Coward? Is that the term to use? Or useless?

What happened has happen, I cannot go back and change any fact. All is past, I look ahead still. Days will get better. They are still important to me, I cannot deny them away from my daily happenings. Yes, I have had painful memories but the happy memories I get is priceless. More than enough to heal the pain over time. No matter how many setbacks I shall face, I will stand again.

Hurt once more

2007-08-12T16:20:00.000+08:00

Why did it have to be you.

Thought everything would be fine after this period of time, was happy once more, gone with the bad nights.

But everything came crashing down. Everyone thought that's the best way, keep me in the dark. Well, yah, but only for the period of time that I was unware right? I have eyes, have feelings, of course I can tell & guess things. Only this time round my confirmation was not what I wished it to be. Well, it did came hard, but the most painful part was being lied to by someone I would have looked up to, someone I cared about, someone I found to be my soul mate.

All is gone.

Don't know how to face you anymore, what kind of feeling should I carry if I met you? Maybe in the near future when I am better, it be better for us all. Caused trouble to all again, especially to someone else which I feel so terrible to for not being able to control myself. But I really couldnt bottom it down. Have your break, I will be strong, I am, are'nt I?

Or maybe I am just a small girl still, unable to handle herself.

Aftermath

2007-07-28T13:12:00.001+08:00

One week past since it has happened.

Cooled down quite alot,

let that be the first and the last time for me.

No more repetition of it.

I hope.

Reflection

2007-07-19T10:16:00.000+08:00

Yup, one week has gone by.

Neither really contacted nor even met up anyone. I guess I am alright now. Been keeping things simple for myself, getting to my usual self.

Breaking down

2007-07-14T17:35:00.000+08:00

Shutting down.

Feeling very weak now, damn vunerable if you would ask me. Breaking down, mind shuts off, isolating up. Slap me awake if you would, please. I want to wake up from this bad dream, get back to my daily rountine life if necessary. Not being able to manage my thoughts, my emotions, my studies, my work. Basically everything. Bringing worries and trouble to all around me.

"All of us care so no matter whatever you do. we are there. But do know that there is a limit to everyone's patience."

This words are ringing in my head. Cant bring myself to think rationally, just cant get rid of them empty feeling in me that I dont belong anywhere. Deep down I know its not true but just cant stop that nagging feeling. It sucks. After today, after tonight, tomorrow is a brand new day, I am going to try to stand strong, stop my nonsense, stop bringing trouble to people. Just a matter of how much time it would take & how its going to be handled.

Sorrows

2007-07-12T11:51:00.000+08:00

Waking up everyday with a heavy feeling in it, can't get it off my chest.

It's clogging up, musch harder to gasp for air.

Things are becoming stale inside.

Hadn't had such feelings for a while.

Not sure what's happening in me, seriously.

Keeping a blank mind, but just seems lost in space with a feeling that weighing me down.

Asking me "What's wrong with you? Talk about it, you will feel better.."

Questioning myself, I don't even know what's my problem.

Why do I feel this way, Why do I behave that way.

The big "Why" is revolving around me but I have no answers for it.

I have stopped thinking.

Family,

Friends,

Work,

School,

Myself.

I just want to a break.

Would it be better?

Would it ever happen for me?

Happy~ness

2007-07-09T13:58:00.000+08:00

Happy.

That's all I wish for.

Make my wish come true...

Weekends

2007-07-02T11:44:00.000+08:00

Had one of the best weekend spenty so far though not exactly on sky high all the moment but still great. Had the usual "kopi-ing" sessions we always did, though this time round it involved some alcohol for a while.

When on to the next day where we met up again for the next round of enjoyment. Went over to MOS, so long since I last stepped into a club.

The no smoking stance has been implied & all the smokers all looked so cramped up in the pathetic smoking area.

LOL!

Saw two familar faces there, Garant and Jia En.

Also got to met up with my sister, Carene!!! Sure will miss u babe, flying off soon this sunday ya...

Problems

2007-06-28T10:24:00.000+08:00

Problems are inevitable, but there would always be a soultion to each and every problem.

The only thing that nags in the mind is what kind of outcome would eventually surface?

People come & go, thats how we meet more people.

But then being a "people" people, I live around in the circle of friends I have made & I am contented. Its all about the relationship, the bonding, the time spent that builds the 'home'. Things are a little messy now, little crack lines are surfacing up the walls.

Dont want to see the crack extending longer, cement should do the trick in mending the cracks. Just what quality of cement.

'Home' is made of bricks and cement, not straw or sticks, so it would stand strong & overcome all harsh weathers. I like the way things were in the past, not really the present. How I wish for a miracle to turn back time...

What's the Point

2007-06-19T18:40:00.000+08:00

What's the point?

Talking doesn't help at all.

It doesn't ever get through anyway.

It falls all to deaf ears.

You're all so stubborn.

Ask me to tell you guys,

I said but you just bite back my words still.

What's the point?

Why am I here in the first place?

Shutting off.

Back off.

Bball Chalet

2007-06-16T11:28:00.000+08:00

Just got back home not long from the long awaited basketball chalet. Basically my sleeping hours so far is probably just about 2 hours? But well, had a long and enjoyable night that would add on down to our memory lanes in each and everyone's heart.

Its been quite awhile since the last gathering, all of us has much to update on and also the crapping in us just doesnt end back in the old school days. Spent nearly the whole night till the break of dawn we chatted and chatted and still we chat.

Always love our meet up :) Thank you Jo Jo for your little gift for us all!

Happy Birthday Tasting

2007-06-15T12:28:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday Tasting Notes!

Celebrating its one year of opening last night over at the Pier and it was Jimmy's birthday as well. Orange was the theme for the night, table clothes were orange, decorations was in orange, people too were dressed in orange! Was like a gathering for us ex-staffs too, had so catch up and updates on each others well being.

How I miss the place, miss working there, miss the people of the past. But like its said, its all in the past, everything has moved on, we have moved on too. People working there too, are now mostly unfamilar face.

Enough of all the emo part, move on Wendy...

Yesterday too was my first lesson at SIM for my bridging course. Starting with Econs. By the time the lesson end, I guess more than half of my brain cells was depleted! Firstly my Econs in poly days was already damn poor and now with just flipping through the lecture notes, I felt like killing myself off already!

But I made a bet with somebody. Somebody named Kenneth Tan who entered army yesterday... He is going to work to his officer rank over the next 2 years while I am going to aim for my honours class.

Hopefully I am determine enough & I will force myself to be!

Genting Trip

2007-06-11T11:06:00.000+08:00

Just got back yesterday evening from Genting.

Spent my past 3 days with Clara, Fishy, Kendy & Ivan indulging in scrumptious delights located further down of Genting. The best "zhi cha" I have ever had! Kangkong leaves that crunches with your bites, succulent wild boar meat cooked to perfection in curry gravy, the hot plate tofu that's served sizzling hot & their prawn was so big and juicy! All in all, the food was fresh, the chef was great & the price, you will never get that pricing in Singapore.

Also we all went a little mad over the drians...

After a very filling dinner we bought 3 drians! Went back to the "zhi cha" store and ordered a pot of tea where we sat there and indulge once again in food. So sinful as it might be, we repeated this series of event the next day, having "zhi cha" and durians with tea.

Of course we didnt just eat and eat the whole of Saturday, went to the theme park, but the weather condition there is so unpredictable, one moment the sun was shining so brightly, and the next the coulds would come and engulf practically all view in sight, light drizzle might follow. Luckily we managed to have a go at most of the rides. But people there like Korea, sure love to cut queue only this time is not the locals doing it but other fellow travellers. I seriously dont understand why do people cut queue, so as to have a shorter queuing time? Just feel that they do not have basic courtesy & I dont feel bad telling them off.

Didnt really get to shop much over at Genting, nothing much special about there product that would get me on the buying. Bought back quite alot of tibits and snacks though.

How much can we S4 indulge and pamper ourselves?

The answer is unlimited. Straight after returning back, we set out to Ang Mo Kio for crab. The chilli crab and milk butter crab is just heavenly! The sauce all thick and saucy. The crab, BIG & juicy! Cant get enough of it!!! Proceeded on to another area in AMK for prata after, I love the cheese sausage prata! Horrible us, are we not? Haha...

Cant wait till our next trip would come, beach resort!

Sick!

2007-05-24T10:37:00.000+08:00

Blah! Was feeling so lousy yesterday! Not sure if it was the food that I ate the day before, but I started to feel all cold and feverish at 5am yesterday. Then threw up and had many toilet trips the whole morning till I went to see the doc. Was suffering from low pressure due to dehydration, then the doc gave me a jab to stop the vomiting, but made me feel all weak and giddy after lox...

I think I actually slept for nearly 20 hours! From the night before to this morning, what a pig I am man! But seriously hate being sick, I dont think anyone would like it though.

Feeling all better today but will be good and stay home to rest, still got to work over the weekends and also watching the priates on Saturday!

How can I miss it all out?!

Graduation day

2007-05-22T22:50:00.000+08:00

Congrats to all my friends & myself!!!

We have graduated from Singapore Polytechnic today as off this morning onwards :)

Ceremony as like always is always boring, fell asleep in the talks just before it was my turn to take the certs! Had a very groggy and blur look man!

But sad thing is I missed out the photo taking with Hui Yun, Jessica, Quant, Yiwen and Pei Jun... cries!

Well, now is to look forward to SIM, hope they would send the mail soon...

My thoughts

2007-05-17T11:21:00.000+08:00

Thinking back, I still have that hanging in the air feeling.

Up till now, I still dont have a proper answer as to why back then, You stop messaging me and cut off all contacts.

But then I aint sure myself what I am feeling right now too, without any mention or link to You, I led my life so normal without any feeling of emo or emptiness.

But just a mention of You, keeps my mind on the go, this is like a silence killer!

I give up!

I should have gave up long ago, but why are You still on my mind?

Single, that's the life I lead, the life I want, no constrictions, no barriers, no guilt of doing anything. Bear that in my mind... how lame can I get?

New Bloggy!!!

2007-05-10T11:20:00.000+08:00

Ta da...my new blog skin with many hugs & kisses to the BIG creator JEAN JEAN!!! Lets do some updating then, got my entry to SIM, waiting for them to send me my package and shall start my bridging courses next month. Going to be super busy starting next month, having lessons, juggling my part time jobs and not to forget my Genting trip with my dearest S4 & also my long awaited basketball chalet! hahaha. Oh, I am now doing retail as well, no longer stuck just in FnB, big step out! ok ok, I am booing a little over. But its a total new experience for me, but not bad, new clothes, new friends, new environment :) okie, thats all for now...

SIM

2007-04-28T15:03:00.000+08:00

Hmm, been a while since I blogged!

But anyway nothing much to update through, its like the same monotonus life I lead everyday. Have been working for the past week all, cause people are sick, cannot work.

Been trying to upload the photos from Korea, but this stupid blog just cant make it. Shall try again some other time then. Haha..

Went to apply for SIM yesterday, under UOL Business Management. Well, really do hope that I will get in, really want to continue studying now.

Got accepted by James Cook University, but the cert aint that recognise, anyway to wait for SIM acceptance, have to give James Cook a miss. The dates clashes...

Well in anyway,

May God be with me, and guide me through :)

Back to Work

2007-04-16T00:46:00.000+08:00

Back to everyday work *sads*

Had a great time at Korea, sightseeing and touring almost the whole of Korea. First thing stepping out of Icheon Airport was freezed man! It was on 3 degrees! My first time ever experiencing such coldness, quite unbearable at start, my hands was pain from cold! Haha...

Went to their theme park, such a long while since I sat roller coast. It was damn hell of fun!

Following the tour, its mostly sightseeing and sightseeing... but the tour group was interesting. Though its families and couples on holiday, everyone is just great, we mixed along well and joke alot too! Went shopping together, eating together.

Most interesting was the spa session. For the first time, I went Naked! Cause no clothes are allowed in the "wen quan", it was naked women everywhere anyway.

Haha... I love korea, I love the weather, I love the food! I want go there again :)

Shall post up the photos soon *smiles*

Holidays

2007-03-30T11:55:00.000+08:00

Enjoyment here I come!

In 3 hours, I shall be at Sentosa Chalet!

Whole 3 days & 2 nights of fun and enjoyment. Leaving behind all my "unhappyness", just relax and enjoy life :)

Continual, will be my trip to Korea with my sis!

Another whole 8 days of great entertainment! New exposure, new sights, new experience!

Nearly 2 weeks of relaxation, free from work, free from troubles just living in a world of my own. Just the thing I needed.

So till then... Ciao!

Happy Birthday

2007-03-27T00:57:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday Fish!!!

About Fishy, I have known her for 7 years now and still counting. My first buddy in school. Not for her, maybe I wont have joined in Basketball back in my Secondary School. Then none of these stories in my life would have exist!

Hahaha, FISHY would you be touched reading this entry?

Its for YOU man!

A special friend of mine, of course not forgetting Clara & Kendy.

Dated back at Sistina, we worked toegther all the way till Tasting Notes. Love the way we team in our work, no need to say much cause I know you know.

Fishy Fishy Fishy...

Happy Fish Day!

New Job

2007-03-15T01:00:00.000+08:00

Seasons is coming to an end for me at the end of the month. After nearly a year of fun and laughter, cant bear to but still I will be leaving.

Tasting Notes too have come to a pause for me. Reason being, my family.

Is this some kind of fate or concidental that both jobs come and go at the same time?

How I wish my parents can be more reasonable. more willing to talk things out and not always see things on one side and think whatever it is, its always the best for me.

Maybe that is true, but cant they just see for themselves I am growing up, where is my freedom of will?

Dont know if I have made a wrong choice, but I dont want to leave this industry.

Agreed to work at Wine Hut. They have hired me too.

Have I made a wrong move, that might cost me in this family?

Prom Night

2007-03-09T04:09:00.000+08:00

Just returned from SB Prom Night at Grand Copthorne Hotel. Not a bad place, but the food was still acceptable only with the price we had paid.

The feeling of seeing everyone was great! Had a tingy feeling I didnt want to graduate, that everyone, all of us could remain as we are and be together studying, making nonsense. But of course I know thats not possible...

Had quite alot of fun, taking photos (not knowing if we will have the change still mah), fooling around and the best was at MOS! Clubbing together, first time for me though with my classmates as a whole. Dancing the night away and making merry within the whole gang.

Such memories to be carried along the way, forgetting all my worries and troubles, just drowning myself in happiness.

I like that.

Shall up load the photos soon!

Hatred

2007-03-06T10:48:00.000+08:00

You guys dont even understand me. I am your daughter but you dont even trust what I do!

I have to follow suit all the way, cant you all understand what I want?

Its always no to this no to that.

Firstly goingto uni you didnt want me study.

Next after allowing me to continue, you wanted me to take a course I dont even have interest in. But I like studying tourism related courses. Yah, I did sign up for it at last.

Everything, I have to go through so much persuasion to get it.

Why?

Now you have problems with my jobs.

I come home too late, thats it.

Havnt you come to realise I aint like your big daughter? I love my jobs, I love the odd hours. I aint that young and ignorant! I can differentiate whats right and wrong, if telling you certain things that happened to me at work has such wrongful thinking implied on your thinking, I choose not to tell anymore things to this family.

Nothing is happy for me here, I want to leave at times...

Its so wrongful of you, accusing my friends, insulting my work, not trusting my work ethics.

Hatred.

Guardian Angel?

2007-03-02T13:01:00.000+08:00

Had some talks here and there.

Falling into deep thoughts.

Really I am wondering, am I abnormal?

Here there are guys out there for me, yet I am hardly moved. Maybe at times yes, but soon it just fades. Telling myself being single is what I want. Is that really true? Or is that just an excuse for myself?

Just thinking of you I guess.

No reasons, No lies.

Coming to bedok interchange once more that night, wondering alone to the bus, I passed by the spot we first met. Still could remember, we saw each other yet unsure is it you, I am suppose to meet up. You in your black druff bag, wearing your basketball attire...

Talking to Joanne, describing the guy of my dreams:

*Tall

*Strong

*Tanned

She told me, aint I just describing a certain someone?

Please kill me,

Kill me for going after something so impossible, so far out of reach.

Happy Valentine

2007-02-14T12:35:00.000+08:00

Happy Valentine to all & of course myself.

To others it might be a special day, a day of loveship. But for me, its just another working day. Sometimes I wonder, if you're in love, seriously, wont it be a valentine day everyday then? Oh well, just not for me, relationship just not my cup of tea at the moment. That special someone is not here for me, cant picture him anywhere.

Clara!!! Know you will read this man!

Cheers to you. Finding a half, imersing in this wonderful days lying ahead of you.

At last I have a "Ah Pa" le. After 7 years?

Blah, Fishy and Me will keep each other company for now.

Enjoy your sweet peeps

*winks*

Some random snapshots...

Blah

2007-02-13T11:28:00.000+08:00

I lead a complicated life. Everything just seems so messed up at times. Other times seems to be in fairyland. Cant it be just happy smooth sailing all the way. Nah of course not. One thing I sure learnt, never to get the things I want in life, having to experience the most unexpected. What's more, its just surprises and shocks.

Whats with me, just dont seem to be opening up at all. Somethings everything just becomes a blur, so near yet too far out for me to reach. Thats the feeling I get. Do everyone experience that as well?

Oh well, sending Daniel off at the airport yesterday made me thing again. Really do feel like studying abroad.

Can I?

Argh!!!

I am 20!!!

2007-01-30T23:48:00.000+08:00

Officially 20 years of age. Ha, but not much of a difference, only lesser presents? lesser wishes? Hahaha, whatever. Had 3 days of havoc from the 26 Jan till 28 Jan.

Lets see, went down to New Harbour on Friday night, first time ever but I had 4 to 5 glasses of 151 on the rocks... Nearly gone if I stayed longer. Thank You guys :)

Went ahead with Jean, Kay, Elaine and Jia Jie to MOS dance the night away *winks*

Come 27 Jan, a dream come true?

Went out with the Pig for movie

Then after had dinner and desserts before meeting the rest at Marina k-Box.

*Hugs to all*

The day itself, 28 Jan

Met Kendy and Clara at Vivo for lunch, Fishy had to celebrate her Mum's so didnt came.

Anyway had lots of fun and great food!

Met Eunice and Jx after, went over for Brownie, joined by Stanley.

Bought a white top at Vivo, got a dress and heels from Darling.

Love u Darling, thank you so much!

Ended of at Sentosa, Cafe De Mal...

Photo taking!!!

Argh!!!!!!!!!

2007-01-22T12:23:00.000+08:00

First received two messages, didnt replied.

Got my last msg as a Goodbye msg.

I replied & everything had to start again.

Ending up losing a friend.

Is it just me, the way I am with my friends? Ended up being reprimanded, looking at the harsh reality which I otherwise thought I could have avoided. I know its just a wishful part of my thinking, but I havnt done much either have I? Stopped practically everything, havnt I? Suddenly I dont want to look forward to the dinner, feeling cranked up. Dont even look forward to my birthday :(

Everything just seemed screwed up.

Ruined.

My mood is down... What the fiak!

Stomach Upset

2007-01-15T16:50:00.000+08:00

January Babies

2007-01-12T01:25:00.000+08:00

Attachment coming to an end finally! Clearing all my leaves which leaves me practically all cleared from work. Ha!

Life still as usual, a few weeks more before I hit the 2...

Having a celebration tomorrow at Seasons Reasons for the January babies which includes Joanne & Kevin. Everybody going to be there.Which includes someone :)

Ahh... What am I doing?

Cant go on like this for another year right?

Nah, I aint sure.

As usual...

Got a Levis Jeans from the people at Seasons Reasons, a whole bunch of them.

Love this Family like crazy.

Bags from Eunice darling.

Whats more to come?

Cant wait for the night to fall again, cant wait to see...

Anticipating.

New Year

2007-01-03T19:52:00.000+08:00

.H.A.P.P.Y..N.E.W..Y.E.A.R. !!!

So fast yet another year le. Year '07, I'm turnin 20... put together, you get 2007!!! Irony right?! Ha.. Ending my attachment soon, goin to clear all my leaves and PH, hopefully all approved. Then I have my last week in hotel next week, abit sad though I am happy it has come to an end.

Nevermind all those, have some photos to post up :)

Sakae Buffet Gift Xchange

The Seasons Family :)

*C.H.E.E.S.E*

.S.E.A.S.O.N.S.A.N.G.E.L.S.

So that is how I spent the last week of year 2006...

But finale was at New Harbour, opening a bottle of red wine, cheers with beers and finally K.O at Blue Ginger... :P

MilkShake Party

2006-12-11T10:10:00.000+08:00

When with Kenneth and his classmates to MOS on Saturday night, actually still got some sec sch mates, but they came too late, & didnt join in the queue. First thing when reach was like, OMG! The queue was all the way to Liang Court! Best was, my phone low batt and the reception there was so bad, couldnt even call out...walkin up & down the stretch of queue saw my french class fren, then after walk again saw my elective fren. Haha...then finally kenneth called me and my fren, Sky brought me to them.

Manage to squeeze into the club, but on the verge of fainting first... Oh man....but getting in wasnt that great after, too many people, everywhere you turn, you bang into people. Got a guy in green shirt and snow cap asking me my age & name -.- Turned to Kah Lun for help...haha. Ended up on the second level cause is really too squeezy, met Sky there again. Party my night to my content & left with kenneth at 2.30am. Went to Mac, cause he hungry and saw my GEMs classmate there!!! Haha, one night I see so many people...

Whole night I kept thinkin of things...

Time to give up?

Mayb the difference is just too great...

Wish List

2006-12-08T01:23:00.001+08:00

Arh...suddenly thought about my wish list for Christmas. (Which I dont suppose I will get it anyway)...

But anyway, first on list a watch?

*Orange, digital adidas

Second NUM tank top...

*White based ~Brazil~

Third...

*a GREEN bikini (like my jacket colour) ???

More???

Cant think much actually, the best wish I can get is not what I can get anyway...

so far away it doesnt even exist I suppose.

Can I ever get what I wish?

What a Christmas I am looking forward to... sighs...

A bad year?

2006-12-07T10:09:00.000+08:00

Some many things happening within a short period of time. Once again... why is it always so that one comes and the rest follows? Is it coincidental or is it jux all on purpose? Though not directly my problems, but still its all people I care about.

Oh darling, you make me worry the most, once was enough, but now again its happening, that time I wasnt there yet this time, I am here yet there is nothing I can do. I am so useless...

Have I learnt to accept the fact? Its been a year, I dont know what I am doin at all, "I am too independent" this phrase really made me think alot, am I really so? Yah, I guess when I think of the things I do. Seems like I dont even need anyone there for me, so used to being by myself. No one to fall on, no one to do all silly things. Its tiring to wait, it just brings you down mentally...

Christmas is coming, am I looking forward to it? NO...nothing special this year at all, just another bad year, exceptionally bad, losing so many love ones...grandpa...byrick...my tutor, Mr Lim...

...all is gone...all is lost...no turning back...

Replies

2006-11-17T00:34:00.000+08:00

Rottens days, lousy luck. When one thing goes in your way, everythings follow suit.

"Dont think too much le, move on bah."

Thats was my final answer given, what shall I do?

Things seems to have gotten better as compared to the past few months,

my cold cold heart was shaken,

I stood strong once more

but to be beaten down straight to the ground.

Cant stand up on my own, too tired.

Everything tried seems worthless.

Advices, questions, doubts.

Move on, move on, move on.

Why are you still here?

Lost, darkness, blinded.

Always thought of a miracle.

But it never exist.

Rotten luck carries on, crack the screen of my handphone, what the fcuk...

K-box

2006-11-13T20:40:00.000+08:00

Went to Marina Square k-box again last night. This time only had Joanne, Sky, Xing Ye and me. Was his last day working at Seasons, will be entering the police academy on Tuesday. Bought some cakes from Bakers Inn down for him and everyone to share. Was shivering there cause didnt bring my jacket along as k-box was not expected. But still got a wind breaker in the end haha, and made to sing with the mike. Really cannot make it de lox, totally like phobia, no sound will come out. Nevertheless still enjoyed myself, hearing everyone singing. Went off early cause this morning still got attachment, got escort down all the way to cab. Haha :D.

Wonder when is the next time gathering again, be it singing or drinking, got u best, but everyone big family gathering is also great!

6 months ago I asked a question, but I got smth negative

Now I earned to ask once more

But held back as I feel its the same still.

Nearly a year, how I wish I know what is your thoughts exactly.

One night Out

2006-11-07T17:59:00.000+08:00

Joined Letty and Joanne together with the Seasons Reasons crew for a celebration night out last night. Part celebration for Shun De early birthday as well as Xing Ye farewell. Wont be able to work with him anymore, going to the police force. Well not exactly his wish of sign on, but close enough.

Was at Marina Square K-Box, hearing them sing, as usual I dont exactly sing, just sing along without a mike :) Had a great time there, listening to them singing while analysing.

kelvin sings like a 40 yr old uncle.

Shun de sings well, but then actions as though he is having cramps!

Jia En likes to stand up high singing, but gek till very jialet too!!

Joanne's vocal is steady and strong.

The Pig, no words to describe, seems as though I cant hear enough of it :p

Thought everything's over, but still a little confuse, my heart just skips a beat everytime I see you. Why??? Nearly a year of waiting, pickin the courage to voice my heart out, but futile.

Living in confusion...

Personality Test

2006-11-03T16:34:00.000+08:00

Happened to go by this from a blog, personality test about me. Quite true though...

Get to know yourself better

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Night Out

2006-11-03T16:02:00.000+08:00

When down to Blue Ginger after work last night to look for Elaine to have our craze night out.

Met Dan and Alan at the restaurant, both of them were like "dont get drunk arh!"--> by Alan.

"Call me if anything. BUT if I answer lah."--> by Dan.

To Dan: no point for that comment if you wont answer the call ya? Haha, but I know everyone is concerned :)

Even sms also got "call me if anything, cant fly down but will rush down"--> by JJ. Seems like 3 big guys looking over me for my one night outing!!!

Haha, but of course will take care of myself and also Elaine, anyway Kenneth was with us (our bodyguard?), went to Dbl O last night. Had a hell of a time dancing from the start to their closing. Legs still aching man :) Entrance was free (Ladies night), drinks was cheap, music was great! What more can I ask for???

Always the same issue, I really feel like continue studying, maybe its a way of extending my path out to the society and more enjoyment time, but then I really still feel like studying to obtain a degree... Tired of listening to my parents telling me not to study, so hurt.

One month

2006-10-25T02:39:00.000+08:00

Seems like yesterday, but yah, one month has passed. When over after work to the road side with Jil just now, saw the lily still there, added my handmades one and Jil left the choco bar. Sat along the railings and had small talks. Still we felt it so impossible, so impossible that this could have happened just along this stretch of road.

Thinking about last night, was so mad at someone whom supposely have no connections. Thought that my mind was clear, but well, I tried to drown in beer but it didnt work, guess my 151 trainings had good effects. At least I didnt create any scenes whatsoever, only someone saw really different side of me after. Am surprised at myself that I would reacted that way. Have I or have I not given it all up on everyone? That makes me wonder, cause I dont have the time nor do I have the heart to try anymore. Its tiring, its hurtful, its futile.

Time

2006-10-08T04:03:00.000+08:00

Its just seems like yesterday that I heard of the news, but now, 2 weeks have passed, everyone is picking up well, supporting Tasting Notes. Just came home from work over there not long ago too, trying to learn my wines again which I stopped mid way. Tasting the wines, asking people how each wines is like. But then, the best part for tonight, once again, I was asked by a customer where is Byrick. Though unexpected and stunned again, this time round I was more composed. But just cant bring myself to say YOU have left us.

Running between both ends is getting to the limit of me, tired I may be, but still I am happy, cause both work place is like my family. I cant do without them. But my friends are equally important, though arguments may arise but after a period of cool down, it would be better wont it? I might be to preoccupied right now, but slowly I make my adjustments. Likewise, my emotions are not haywired, just that certain things happened too suddenly and unexpected, I aint cold blooded, it hurts me of course I would cry, I would feel down. But give me time, by a weeks time I will be strong again. I have no one to rely on now, only to stand on my own if I fall. I will be strong.

Life goes on

2006-10-02T23:28:00.000+08:00

Eight days have passed, slowly gathering myself up. Seeing Jil standing strong for Tasting Notes, I must also do so. Tasting Notes' the final memory and dream of Byrick's, togther with everyone, we will make this dream live on. When down to the accident area togethe with Biyu last night, at the stretch of road outside Henry Park, saw the stratches on the railing, some how still in disbelieve of the accident at that point of time, but still you have left us. Gave a white lily, your favourite flower.

Things arent all that smooth for me now, getting weak from all the long days, falling down le... Many unhappiness I brought to my close ones, I am so sorry darling, how I wish I could tell you exactly my feelings, but whatever I said, the meaning just doesnt turn out right, so I guess I have to take things slowly and let it cool down...

Work at Tasting Notes

2006-09-28T01:51:00.000+08:00

Was working just now at Tasting Notes, saw the notice pasted on the glass panel and also the book of condolence at the Bar counter for guest to pen down whatever they want. Everything seems the same and all, but the atmosphere difference is so great, I felt so listless, everything felt so empty to me. Your missing presence made a great deal, the place felt different without you in the bar counter. No more calling "Byrick bill!", no more "Byrick, customer need help with the wines", no more "boo" coming from you behind my back.

Never would I expect that the question would be asked, a question that made me felt even worse then how I was already felt.

Guest: "Where's Byrick?"

Me: (speechless)

Guest: "Today he off arh?"

Me: "He..." (cant even say, showed guest the notice on the bar counter)

Guest stunned, look at me.

Me: "Byrick met with an accident..." (cant continue, the notice says it all)

Guest also became speechless, shakes his head and head back to his sit.

2006-09-27T10:37:00.000+08:00

3 days have since passed, going down again tomorrow night.

Memories after memories have been repeatingly replaying in my head. Right from the first day we met you and you interviewed us for work, we asking silly questions. All the way down to the times at work no matter where it was, the mistakes we did but you guide us along, the late night movies at cineleisure, suppers we had together and also bowling sessions at Kim Seng bowl. All these memories and more of it, still so fresh in my memory, how could you have gone? Cant it just be some sick joke? Am i dreaming? I keep asking myself that. Though I chose to step into the F&b line, You were the one who made me enjoy being in this line, taught us well in all aspects of this industry yet having fun and all.

Just a few days back, we were just working together at Tasting Notes, and sms-ing. But the next everything became a blur for me and everyone else. Tears after tears rolled down our cheeks, feeling of emptiness have developed in me, feeling like a empty shell right now, seeing you lying in the coffin, my tears became uncontrollable, how I wish we could just shake you awake and let it all be a joke. Let it be the joke of the year, let it be another "april fool's" joke, how I just wish it was. Here we are all in pain, crying, looking back, everything seems as though it was just yesterday, yesterday that you interviewed us, yesterday that I was working for you, yesterday that you silently appearing up my back and scared me...

Byrick

2006-09-26T01:10:00.000+08:00

It been near 3 years

You taught us how,
How to work in this industry,
From the basics all the way up.

Setting tables, clearing plates
Sitting guest, taking orders
Serving dishes, making drinks
So many so many...

More than that,
You gave us so much more.
Things outside work

Advises, solutions, help

Guiding us all through these years
So many precious memories.

Remember the day of our interview,
We asked if dying hair was allowed?
Which became a favourite tease in the coming 3 years.
You gave me the nick "Tweety Bird"
We were one big family,
Gathering, enjoying, working
Having a great time all together.
Still we are one big family
Cause you will live in out hearts.

You loved your job,
You loved your bike.
You are our superior,
You are our friend.
You have always been the best
The best manager, the best friend I ever can meet.

It happened all so suddenly, no one expected it coming. It felt like a dream receivng the call, everyone was stunned, nobody believed it, felt like a joke, took sometime to accept. Tears roll down my eyes, recalling all that we guys shared, from Sistina to Wine connection to Enotria to Tasting Notes. Your dream came through with the opening of Tasting Notes, you put in so much to see the pickin up of the business. Each place you went, Fish and me joined along with you learning the ropes as u patiently teach us, correcting our mistakes, guiding us to the right path. Work was never boring when its working with you, having fun at the same time while in the midst of entertaining heavy crowds. So long since I has the best Singapore Sling you made, so long since we had big gatherings and movie outings. Things we are unable to do anymore. Dont know how are we going to do it without you, its just so different. Nobody to tease us, no one to scare me from the back anymore, no more introducing me as tweety to guest anymore. So loss without you around.

Byrick,
My mentor, my manager, my friend.

Why?

2006-09-14T00:03:00.000+08:00

Waiting,

Does anything good ever comes out of it?

Not for my case in anyway I suppose.

It seems so near yet so far.

I might have fallen yet again,

Have to pick my self out of this shit

Not the first yet not the last either,

When will this all stop?

Who is it to save me from the misery?

Just one simple word,

One constant action.

Is it that hard?

Or am I just too out of reach?

Dreams Vs Reality

2006-08-30T16:20:00.000+08:00

Everythings seems to be in a dream to me now...

Leaving for Bangkok with eunice on a holiday right after exams, something I never dreamt my parents would let me do. I just felt as though it was a dream, yes, a dream come true for me. Being on a trip with my friends, relaxing enjoying, having a hell lots of fun. Yah, thats was the best few days of my life.

Yet now, I have fallen into another dream, a dream I never want to step in. Everything came as a shock to me, tears just rolled down my eyes hearing the news. How I wished I was there, how I wished I could have seen you for the last time.

I miss my grandfather... I really miss him so much

Happy Birthday

2006-08-18T07:54:00.000+08:00

16 hours and 5 minute more?

Happy Birthday :)

ITP posting

2006-08-01T18:44:00.000+08:00

Oh yah, so I got into Four Seasons Hotel for my attachment. Going to have to spend my next 5 months over there, rotating round the whole hotel. Wonder where will I start off first and what will be expected of me? Will I be able to survive there? So many questions revolving round my mind.

Arh, but still got to tackle my final exams first...

Kind of regretfully not choosing to go Conrad, but what the hell, I made the final decision, so live with it lox. Make the best out of it bah...hahaha

Birthday pics

2006-07-30T23:51:00.000+08:00

Some pictures from the chalet, 26/7...

So this was the cake...

After eveyone took a mouthful of it, cause cleverly, no one took a knife....

The "HIGHLIGHT" of the night... *winks*

Happy Birthday

2006-07-27T23:32:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday my dear Eunice!!!

Half and hour more before this day come to an end...hoped u enjoyed every moment of it.

Having to get everything all goin and trying to hide it from you was so hard!!! Sometimes in between just clash but then still got it straightened out :)

Chalet was short, but fun...if only there was no school today, I would surely have stayed all the way through...

Dun be worried about the presents? Its all for u, Its cuz there is you, thats why I am here, happy and going. Everything is worth it darling :)

Caught 2 movies today, Lake House and Lady in the Water, guess we were kind of all tired, hahaha. Dont fall asleep in the theatres, not miss all the nice part of the show...

Happy birthday again darling, jux remember, always keep that smile on :D

Dilema

2006-07-21T11:12:00.000+08:00

Argh!!! So tired, so stress over my internship interviews. Now everyday is just school, projects and INTERVIEWS!

Body just so tired, not having the time to replenish my sleep lost... For now, all my interviews are done and over with. The only thing now is where will I end up at? Had only considered Sentosa all along before the interviewing starts. Now I am stuck with the other choices.

Conrad, expressed their views of welcoming me abroad to their F&B sector, doing my internship mainly over at "Oscar". This is so tempting! But I will still be a service crew, nothing much that I would be able to gain.

But still....

Four Seasons, gone through all 4 interviews with all the directors, stressful but they are nice people. Will be on a rotating shift all round the Rooms Division and F&B Division for the whole internship to get a feel of how a Hotel works, hopefully I find a sector I have interest in and continue even after I graduated.

Sentosa, the one I had hoped so much to get in. Been through the mass interview, found our what they have for us, am tempted to go into their Customer Servicing Unit or their Retail.

What should I do???!!!!

Kill me, hate decisions...

Back!!!

2006-07-02T17:40:00.000+08:00

Let's see, first week of the second term and I am totally draining out!

It's school, school & school. Porjects after projects. And of course work.

Just came back from sijori resort...

Damn tired, hadnt not pratically slept at all. First night arrived after working OC, was like 3 am? Slept for a good two hours and was up. Did alot activities, swimming, tanning, volleyballing, cycling, walking, musical fountain, sakaeing, piggyback riding, watching England verse Portugal match, drinking. Haha, damn tired lah, everyone slept like 2am plus, but I hardly slept cuz practically got squeezed out of bed, "noise" level was high and too cold!!!

Had a good 2 days of fun, so now is back to reality, back to real work. Projects... -_-"

Stitch Removed

2006-06-23T02:36:00.000+08:00

Stitches removed, flesh in the process of healing, but then the skin not yet. Stitches removed only and the detached skin can be seen right away. Ewww... Doing self medication, no $$ everytime go see doctor lox. But the doctor so damn cute lah, so easy to psyco him to come Tasting Notes for a drink!!! & like he said he really cant drink much man, so easy face red le... hahaha.

Few more days of holiday left, didnt work much at all this holiday, not much extra cash, didnt buy any of the items I wanted to buy... pengX...

Stitches

2006-06-15T02:39:00.000+08:00

And so I received 6 stitches on my left thumb,

with Biyu nearly on the verge of fainting looking at my flesh.

Conclusion: Never cut wine corks again!!! :P

Happenings

2006-06-10T21:37:00.000+08:00

Thursday

When practically wround the whole of singapore in one afternoon and night. Went out with eunice, stanley and jian xiang. Visited the night safari too, bad experience!! Got bitten by ants, all 4 of us!! Hahaha :D

Friday

Did our project interview at Marine Parade and was walkin in Parkway when I got the shock from stanley who appeared out of nowhere.. wat an asshole :P After met Kenneth at Bugis for dinner then went Tanjong Pagar meet the rest watch soccer. Abit unpleasant but things turn out better in the end.

1st Corinthians 13

2006-05-30T21:03:00.000+08:00

1st Corinthians, Chapter 13.

Verse 4-7.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastul or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritatble, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Byrick's Birthday

2006-05-30T20:33:00.000+08:00

Presenting the CAKE!!!

with compliments from joseph :)

&...of course the birthday boy

who got tired after a nite's event :)

The Family, which made it all possible <3

grace, grace..too obsess with da cake

look down, & smile!!!

say cheese!! :D

the ultimate "ghosts" of the month!!

Series of events.

2006-05-28T01:24:00.000+08:00

Thursday

When out with kenneth for jacket hunt. In the end got no nice but anyway the orange looks weird on me. But then thought the green jacket looks nice!!! haha.

Friday

When over to Wine Hut in the evenin to celebrate Byrick's birthday. Got nearly all of the WC ex-staff!! Even had a chocolate cake baked by Joseph. YUMMY!!! Took lots of pic too, and had a great time catchin up with everyone. Went to the new shop to see too, its do near WC hahaha.

Saturday

Went to work fuction. Not BG one, else where. Not bad, the pay was good and the staffs though from all over the place but was easy goin and friendly. Also got 2 jobs offer. Haha. Goin for interview this comin friday bah...

Thinking Of You

2006-05-23T20:46:00.000+08:00

I think of you, but do you think of me?

Whats with the trend this few months?

Breaking up, confessing love, askin if the other party wants to enter into a relationship.

All around me, I am witnessing all sorts. Seeing people over the moon, fallin head over heels, heartbroken, cryin their hearts out...

Whats with these faze?

Head over heels for you, but whats the use when you dont know a thing? Its always just me, me, me and still me over here who is waiting, thinking, smiling at myself foolishly in thoughts.

What about you? I just wished I can read your mind, your thoughts...

Am I or am I not just another fool doin the impossible?

Bouncy

2006-05-14T22:54:00.000+08:00

Thoughts

2006-05-14T21:49:00.001+08:00

Got this off at lala's blog, felt its meaningful...

"Love is not to forget but to forgive,

not to see but to understand,

not to hear but to listen,

not to let go but to hold on."

"Dont ever leave the one you love for the one you like,

for the one you like will leave you for the one they love."

But whats the measurement of love, how far can it be extended? What are the signs of love? Its it all about patience and waiting, givng unconditional love and not expecting any returns?

Tarot Cards

2006-05-10T20:14:00.000+08:00

Got a tarot prediction by Geraldine today in school. Everything was so accurate, so in place. Though I know not to believe that all would be true, but of course I do hoped that it would be as what was predicted...

Its good, but will it be true?

If only.... :)

Saturday nite out

2006-05-08T17:58:00.000+08:00

Proudly presently....the singing

"queen" & "king"

& of course the 4 " followers"... :P

finally the 2 "ya tou" ...

So badly to say it out

2006-05-04T20:09:00.000+08:00

"I miss..."

How I wish to voice out myself, how I wish...

Missing Chances

2006-04-24T23:20:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, coming to know of a truth hurts, even though its a past.

Why dont I ever trust my senses and let my chances fly by?

Why am I afraid? Afraid to hear what I do not wish to hear?

Met Jean Jean this evening at Coffee Bean, had a good talk with her and discovered some things which made me feel like killin myself on the spot right away. How come will turn out this manner? Made me really wonder what happened if I had just made myself clearer then, maybe things wouldnt have been like what it is now. Have I really made the wrong move from the beginning? Things was so much smoother then, communication hadnt broken down, sharing craps and jokes, but then suddenly everything came to a stop, leaving me dangling in mid way.

Is it all too late now? How I wish I have a answer....

New Semster

2006-04-19T23:17:00.000+08:00

Three days has passed, which means I had 3 days of school. Not really that bad for a start, at least I am not falling asleep at practically every lesson. Only a sleep at the introduction of oir new modules :) I got listen to my lectures worx. Haha... Feel that this semster's subject quite tough, mostly are those dry and boring modules, really have to keep myself from falling asleep! Last year le, so got to bucked up!

Went over to Sengkang last night to attend alan's dad funeral wake with the rest of the BG guys and today really almost late for school!! But I'm gald that Alan's fine and alright, only thing is tired.. You cant get any "skinny-er" lox, cause ya already got no fats to lose le :P Dont kill me if you saw this sentence. Really, take good care of yourself and your mum too, may God Bless You always :)

Sentosa

2006-04-16T01:19:00.000+08:00

Where's Wenxu???!!!

That's us, at sentosa...

And us again at Sakae Sushi!!!

Break Down

2006-04-14T03:37:00.000+08:00

So, here it is at curious underground that I break down in front of everyone.

I'm so sorry guys if I spoiled the night.

Byrick's Bike

2006-04-11T03:15:00.000+08:00

Just caught "Inside Man" with Byrick after work, home now of course. The show's great man! The way people's mind work sometimes really is a wonder, the show's great, the people is great and of course the company is great!!!

And of course the best part was on the road! hahaha, at last I get to sit Byrick's bike like after 3 years? :)